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Knowing myself helped me communicate better to my partners later on, and made everything else less stressful! But guess what? When you get to college, you'll actually start talking to other women about this. I suffer from severe anxiety, and have trouble falling asleep at night.
My therapist recommended masturbation as a tool for coping. I don't feel like being apologetic about my sexuality and that kind of attitude implies that my body is just there for someone else's pleasure and not my own. It felt awkward and didn't bring me any pleasure. I was confused and discouraged from trying again. It wasn't until years later that I understood the importance of the clitoris — both in pleasuring myself and being pleasured by someone else.
I always wondered why it was accepted as "normal" for guys and taboo for girls. Now I understand it as completely healthy and fun! I went to Catholic school , so nobody talked about it ever. And that I was gross and weird for it. I wish I knew that as a woman I was allowed to have a sex drive.
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